CHAPTER 4b: SLAVES RETREAT PART II

When it arrived in Albany, it had already read enough self-help books to understand many of the concepts that Master R was eager to share. Truthfully, it was a test of mental and emotional endurance. The physical part was a given. The anticipation of being called to play was the golden carrot. Dangle it, he did. To sexually serve and please the Master and Mistress of the Domaine was how it got through a full day of menial and arduous house chores.

The reality: the opportunity happened only once the entire weekend. The Mistress took it down to their dungeon, a BDSM playground replete with bondage gear, rope, rope and more rope, steel crates, every size dildo, padded horse barrel, and of course, the St. Andrew’s cross. This couple of hours spent serving at the Mistress’s pleasure, was so lovely. The long raven black hair, her strong figure melted into the latex, and disposed sweet sadism. Yes. This is why the local slaves adored Mistress C. She knew how to be in complete control without cruelty for cruelty’s sake. Of course, there are Dommes out there who revel in the S & M of BDSM. This of course is understood, but the line is fine when it comes to abuse and the best are careful with this. Mistress C practiced and played her sweet sadism like a perfectly tuned Stradivarius. How powerful the mind is to endure traditional discomfort when you find yourself surrendering to another’s will and desire. The slap of the leather against its backside. When one or more of your senses are removed and full trust is handed over to someone you have only known for a day. The bristle of the rope and the artful imprint it left above my breasts and around my stomach. Those imprints were its trophy.

At the end of a long day, it would be instructed to watch tv with Master R and Mistress C. We gathered in the bedroom watching the mundane on television. It was hoping that there might be some play time, a sexual rendezvous in recognition of its obedience and tasks completed. Instead, it was just an ordinary night. As it lay on the worn carpet of their bedroom, it imagined, how many other slaves had sat obediently in that very spot, quietly watching the late-night news. As it lay its head to the pillow that night, naked in this tightly done harness, the only thought was that it was pleasing its Master.

An Autobiography and Revelations. Reality Imitating Art or Is It the Reverse?

One could say that the time in Albany was an information and sensory overload. The people, situations, tasks, felt like a push/pull of experiences. It walked into those days feeling overconfident and ready to obey. Yet, there was also a feeling that this was theatre. Candidly, it thought many times of The Story of O, and it being the star in its own version. Somehow, it walked away from Albany feeling it set itself back.

It recalls meeting slave Couple. A youthful, enthusiastic female slave at the ripe age of 18/19, who was full on a pupil of Master R and Mistress C. A background as a dancer, she was ready to commit, even coming out to her parents about her lifestyle. This was shocking to hear. A true overachieving slave! In truth, its a big step to share news like that with family members It admired that boldness, and wondered if it could ever get there. A slave that was eager to be trained and pushed under the tutelage of Mistress Cand Master R. One who showed slave Couple the ropes, literally, and a Master who kept her mind in a psychological waltz. The last I heard, slave Couple found her dominant side.

Revelation: Some relationships are not meant for everyone to witness. At the height of my desire to be owned, it wasn’t something that it wanted everyone to know about it, because that required the action of acceptance. The only action that matters is the one that covets and the one that desires to be coveted.

Revelation: Master R wrote a book. He shared excerpts from his self-published autobiography with both his “house” and visiting slaves. This time with him was in the final hours of its time at La Domaine Esemer. It couldn’t help but feel cheated. In all of its research on power exchange relationships, the Dominant understands how important the care and attention of the slave is. This was missing in its overall experience. The strongest of bonds can still have fragility. The vulnerability in the giving of oneself is carefully reckoned, tested but also always given due care. Listening to Master R, it seemed like he was just self-important. It had been in the presence of good Tops and bad ones, and Master R, despite a weekend of high protocols, was reveling in his own ego. It had learned to play house but it also discovered that it had deeper questions to answer as far as its readiness to fully submit.

The Best Journeys Have the Highest Peaks and the Deepest Valleys.

It would need to find peace in the giving over of its whole body and mind to its Master. For it is not up to the slave who it serves. It is up to the Master. The slave shall find its pleasure in service. It should not feel bias. It is the Master who determines where, when and how pleasure, pain and tasks are executed.

Human beings are naturally Darwinian. It must prepare and practice to be natural. A task that requires wiping a reflexive and biologic imprint clean. This would be both a deep valley and stiff peak to overcome.