BE THE MAN EVERY WOMAN WANTS
Dating at any age isn’t easy. While the objectives change depending on our stage of life, that slight awkwardness we feel at the start, is one that always feels familiar. I have many male friends at various stages, who all echo the same sentiment – putting yourself out there with seemingly fruitless results. They may be young and never married or divorced.
A wise, divorced friend of mine would always say that dating is like sales…” its all about pipeline, then identifying the best and converting them.”
The Swipe Factor
The world of online dating has become a game. An Algo-based behavior that prompts as little effort as possible. Swipe right, swipe left. Subsequent conversations and dates may reflect this level of superficiality. That is not to say it isn’t possible to meet your future partner but it can begin to feel like a romantic wasteland.
So How Does a Man Make the Right Impression?
- Go all in. First, I tell my friends, that in dating, like in business there is a certain amount of “show.” If you start out showing all of your cards, who you really are, there just isn’t any mystery or drama in that. Don’t wear on your first date what you might wear on your 6th date. Impress her by putting thought into a date. It isn’t about the cost but “coffee” is a throwaway and shows immediately that you are hedging. In the conversations leading up to your date, ask questions, that allow for a thoughtful execution of a first encounter.
- Dress to arouse. Speaking of wardrobe, do what women do and go shopping. A new outfit, whether it’s an investment piece or not, can do wonders for that little extra boost in confidence. If you can, get suggestions from a close female friend who would rather die than steer you wrong in the fashion dept. Looking good on the outside, feel good on the inside. There is no need to peacock, but new clothes do make the man.
- Steer clear of too much small talk. Be prepared to ask interesting and personality-revealing questions. Avoid those stupid questions that dating apps make you put on your profile to test compatibility. Be genuine in your interest. Ask open-ended questions, make observations.
- Laughter Cures All. A good sense of humor can take the awkwardness out of any situation. Getting someone to smile
- When in Doubt – ABC. Don’t hesitate. If you are into her, ask for the 2nd date at the end of the first. When the chemistry and connection are there, you feel it. Listen to your gut.