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THE GREATEST LAW WE ARE AVERAGE AT LIVING BY
"...But I tell you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be children of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that?" Matthew 5:44-47 An excerpt of a Gospel reading from a Sunday morning mass. The Priest talked about the greatest commandment, the only true commandment…
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FRIDAY FANTASY: WAITING FOR YOUR NOD
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YEARNING FOR THE SIMPLICITY OF TOUCH
A desire burns within all of us to be touched in that way. There is no label for it. It isn’t always easy to articulate. However, you know when it happens. When your hand touches mine. When my cheek rests on your shoulder, chest, inner thighs…and then comes the exhale of everything. This energy stops just short of carnal, for a moment. Its tender and deep. A story being written in motion of two people giving each other what they have. All of it. Nothing left behind. That is intimacy. It is something that can’t be manufactured because it comes from deep within. A mystery in chemistry. The magic of…
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MONDAY MORNING LOVE NOTE
From me to you, over and over…
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FRIDAY’S FANTASY: WHAT THE EYES REVEAL
“…He asked with his eyes more than his lips…” A line from a Robert Frost poem that leapt out at me.
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A HUMP DAY RECOLLECTION
I wonder if you think about it as much as I do…
- AUDIO NOTES, human behavior, monday morning love, motivation, PROOF OF GROWTH & CONNECTION, self development, Uncategorized
A NEW WEEK, A NEW LOVE NOTE
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” Ralph Waldo Emerson At the end of the day, it is should be our characters and the foundation we build within ourselves that we look at and share as our greatest success in life. The success of knowing who you are. This is also a lifelong achievement with only upside potential.
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A FRIDAY FANTASY IN WORDS
Sometimes things happen when our husbands pass out in front of the TV. My son showed up unexpectedly to wish me a happy birthday and caught me in undress – my bra, garter, stockings and heels. I’m blushing as I recount this story. My birthday dinner with my husband was nice and heavy on the promises to cum. On the drive home, I took my seatbelt off so my hand could enjoy the birthday present he had growing for me between his Italian-clothed legs. Only a few more minutes, and I would be receiving the birthday fuck I’d been fantasizing about. Unfortunately, Elijah Craig and ESPN needed him more.…
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THE POWER OF THE FLIRT
Don’t think of flirting as having intended sexual consequences. Instead, let’s see flirting as a simple but powerful form of communication. An opportunity to harness kinetic energy between individuals, unleashing creativity and confidence with powerful reverberation. Get out of your own head, off of your phone and flirt more!
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MONDAY MORNING LOVE: ITS TIME…
“Everyone should smile. Life really isn’t that serious. We make it hard. The sun rises. The sun sets. We just tend to complicate the process.”Everyone should smile. Life really isn’t that serious. We make it hard. The sun rises. The sun sets. We just tend to complicate the process.” Arian Foster What is obvious we tend to overlook. Perhaps it is because we need a puzzle to solve. The approach to life can’t be super simple. Creating our own success has to be a bit more complex, doesn’t it? A basic behavior like smiling, we forget to do it. And let me tell you, serious looks aren’t your friend as…
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SUNDAY NIGHT LOVE: IN THE ELEVATOR
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FRIDAY CONFESSIONS: ITS NOT WHAT YOU THINK
It just turned to Friday. It’s late and I’m ready to whisper in your ear. I want to share something with you. Will you listen?
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MONDAY NIGHT WHISPERS: STANDING ERECT
Just listen.
- AUDIO NOTES, CLIENT THEOREM, dos and donts, intimacy, PROOF OF GROWTH & CONNECTION, relationships, words of wisdom
CLIENT BAD BEHAVIORS: MR. BUGS BUNNY
Bugs Bunny LOVED his carrots. He enjoy flaunting them too. I was compelled to write about a common client behavior because of a tweet. A fellow companion mentioned how some clients love to over promise and then under deliver. This isn’t a good business practice as anyone who is in business will tell you. Listen in to hear more about this phenomenon in the client/companion relationship. While I don’t think it is ever done with malicious intent, I also think that the client/provider relationship can create a lot of Bugs Bunnies. Personally, I love a client who with his actions and never his words, completely surprises and delights. Listen in…
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MORNING LOVE: THE PRACTICE OF INTIMACY
The true practice of intimacy can happen in what might seem to be the most awkward of moments. Yet, it is the openness and presence in which intimacy is felt that allows for this bond we create to thrive and not stall out. Intimacy is not a fairy tale. It is not perfection. The tenderness of leaning into a moment that could feel or be distracting, doesn’t have to be. It’s down to your willingness to explore the discomfort and simultaneously decide what you want to make of it. The beauty of companionship is in the shapeshifting of intimacy, the fun of that learning, growth.
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FRIDAY FANTASY: A RUSH OF BLOOD
Because I miss you.
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HUMP DAY LOVE: NYC HERE I COME
We all need a little love.
- CLIENT THEOREM, escort thoughts, intimacy, PROOF OF GROWTH & CONNECTION, seduction, sexual connection
MONDAY MORNING LOVE
Get lost in that touch for a moment, two or three. How good it feels to have that warm hand caress you gently. Never obvious, always discreet and yet still, your mind finds its way to the dirtiest corner. You feel a lift. That’s always reassuring. A whisper, a laugh, a look. We aren’t playing games rather its just the slow path to something good. Yet, we aren’t getting ahead of ourselves. We know the significance of the present. The feelings evoked. We way not get enough but when do those mental pictures are poignantly vivid. Blink once twice as if your lashes are sweeping down on the shutter of…
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THE IRISH CHEER
A little Irish note…don’t kill me for the accent!
- CLIENT THEOREM, dating, escort thoughts, intimacy, love, PROOF OF GROWTH & CONNECTION, relationships
ARE WE IN A SEXUAL RECESSION?
Recently I listened to the Impact Theory podcast. The guest was Sex Therapist Emily Morse. What was immediately apparent, is the significance of non-sexual points, like balancing your identity that seem to be the catalyst for why sex, or intimacy for that matter, has found its way to the bottom of the proverbial “to do” list. Basically, the more confident and centered you are within yourself, the better you can relate in connection with others. That’s obvious though, right? And yet, perhaps in a social-media, stuck-to-our-phones world, it’s not. Sure we smart enough to recognize this but maybe just too lazy to change. We should let the power of touch…
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HUMP DAY LOVE: A LITTLE JUICE
We are feeling signs of spring in the air. A note from me to you, while you sit down to start your day, or maybe just to keep your day going…
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MONDAY MORNING LOVE: BE THOUGHTFUL
The start of a new week, and I want to show you some love to get it started.
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BREAKING BREAD – A NEW CHAPTER
Four days into my moving to a new city, I reconnected with an awesome, talented gentleman over dinner in Cambridge. It was my first date since my move to the Boston area on March 1. Intimacy takes time and yes, practice. In my case, I’ve been practicing for the last 12 years. I think sometimes you are Now I am living in a new city and getting to know it – the good, bad and ugly. What is Interesting About a Man. It’s no secret that I love men. I appreciate them and enjoy learning their secrets, vulnerabilities and what makes them special. Some are in my life for many,…
- AUDIO NOTES, friendship, intimacy, love, monday morning love, motivation, PROOF OF GROWTH & CONNECTION, relationships
MONDAY MORNING LOVE: WHAT JOHANN MISSED
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INTIMACY IN FLUX
In my latest audio note, I discuss the idea of disconnection. We don’t talk about the reality of the client/companion relationship or the opportunity for its potential. It really is one of the most unique relationships you will ever foster in your life. The depth and breadth of which are up to you with no permanence or weight.
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FANTASY FRIDAY: THE SNAKE CHARMER
It’s been too long…
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The Letter
I was going through my desk drawer the other day and found a letter from my ex-husband. It was a letter he wrote me when he made me my Hope Chest. His engagement gift to me. I love a man who can work with his hands. Our divorce was two decades ago but his words aged beautifully. Imagine an electrical engineer who can write like Shakespeare. There in my tiny Upper East Side bedroom, I was transported to that day. The exquisite hope chest he had hand carved that would hold our precious memories, as we embarked on a new life together filled with hope and promise. Twenty years late…
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MONDAY MORNING LOVE: SPEECHLESS
Cherish the experiences that render you speechless. It can happen when we least expect it. Comfort in an “awkward pause.” A grunt. A slow, slightly humming exhale. “There are some experiences in life they haven’t invented the right words for.” Lisa Kleypas Happy new week!
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STORY TIME: STRANGER ON A TRAIN
The NJ Transit and Metro North trains have a special place in my heart. NJ Transit especially, in my early years of commuting…and that handsome stranger…
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BECAUSE SOMEONE TOLD ME ITS TITTY TUESDAY
And mine are big.
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THE LONELY SLAVE
It can’t lie. The choice to be his was a compelling but arduous one. He was a married man with a family and a business life that had him traveling most of the month. His homes in London, NYC, and out west didn’t leave us much time. He was clear on the terms and they weren’t easy. However, it just couldn’t resist. There was something between us that was undeniable. It wasn’t lust but adoration, maybe? A feeling that portrays a different way of emoting, behavior, and consequences. You aren’t quite operating in lust and limbic and you know that what seems rational is irrational to some. It was determined.…
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SATURDAY SEX THOUGHTS: LUCK BE THE LADY
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MORNING LOVE: START AGAIN, SAM
Like the famous film by Woody Allen, “Play it Again Sam,” we all want another chance. Yet every other minute of the day, there is one. What are you waiting for?
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THE EYE-SOUL CONNECTION
“The eyes are the window to the soul.” We hear this and it sounds romantic, deep and meaningful. If you think about the function of the eyes, they are essentially the camera of the brain. The synapse of those images, happens faster than we count; the different parts of the eye connect with the optic nerve that serves them to our brain. More importantly, our behavior and emotions are shaped by what we see. In fact, in many cases, it can be said that another part of our brain overrides what we see. In a moment of intimacy and connection, are we lost in our own souls or each other?
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MORNING LOVE: A WARM TONGUE ON A COLD DAY
Something to listen to with your coffee.
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SIMPLE PASSIONS: GOING DEEP
This weekend I watched a French film, “Simple Passion“ that took me into my past, churned up my body, mind, and soul, and spit out some great insights into life, that I wasn’t prepared for. Of course, it was a film based on the autobiographical book of the same title by Annie Ernaux. An empowering body of work that permits you never to regret. Passion to feel passion. Their body is the vessel. Yet, life’s lessons teach so well, and maybe one day you will be ready for just one. “I experienced pleasure like a future pain.” Annie Ernaux
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CHAPTER 4b: SLAVES RETREAT PART II
When it arrived in Albany, it had already read enough self-help books to understand many of the concepts that Master R was eager to share. Truthfully, it was a test of mental and emotional endurance. The physical part was a given. The anticipation of being called to play was the golden carrot. Dangle it, he did. To sexually serve and please the Master and Mistress of the Domaine was how it got through a full day of menial and arduous house chores.
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PETITE FRIDAY INSIGHTS: GREAT EXPECTATIONS
The big “E.” We all have them even if we don’t want to admit we do. In committed romantic relationships, they are expected but what about friendships or the beginnings of building rapport and connection? This topic isn’t sexy but I think we all have situations in our lives where expectations were Mrs Peacock in the library with the candlestick.
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WEDNESDAY STORY TIME: THE GUEST STAR
The year was 2015. Two threesomes in a week is like seeing a pig fly. It just doesn’t happen…..except it can and it does. The girl was so much fun. She was nervous but I thought it was cute. A curvy, native New Yorker – her thick mess of long, brown wavy hair and ivory skin begged to be kissed. In the nerves of a situation, roles will change; the guest star is now the dominant character. I started by simply unzipping my dress. He was sprawled out comfortably on the bed, lazily and dreamily watching. My eyes were locked on her. When someone is nervous in a sexual situation,…
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CHAPTER 4: AWAKENING AT SLAVE CAMP PART I
Yes, “slave camp” exists. Well, it’s more of a retreat than a camp, if you want to call it that. Based in Albany, NY, La Domaine Esemar tries to be something out of the “Story of O.” What looks like a typical home in the suburbs of Albany, has a community of people coming and going – local submissives, visiting Mistresses, a fully equipped basement dungeon and of course their decadent weekend parties. The commencement of those weekend parties was a Bacchanalian feast that would make even Bacchus blush. Indeed, the stars of those parties were never the scantily dressed slaves nor the richly latex-laden Mistresses, but rather the bottles…
- AUDIO NOTES, CLIENT THEOREM, confessions, dos and donts, escort thoughts, fantasy, intimacy, intimacy
PRIVATE PARTS: THE BELOVED TAINT
Sharing a few thoughts on one of the most intimate acts…rimming.
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Fantasy Friday: A Symphony Between the Thighs
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THROWBACK THURSDAY STORY TIME: A PICTURE WITH SO MANY WORDS
As the holidays wind down and life goes back to normal, I found a photo of me from December 2013, covered in Christmas lights. In the corner of the photo were our terms of endearment for each other, “RKPet by JSquare.” I was his pet. We started as client/companion and eventually became lovers. My lover/play partner, and former client, was so good at capturing a moment and all of the emotion that went along with it. A wild weekend in SLC with a 15-year-old Chilean Cabernet from the Winemaker’s private cellar, and some serious playtime. Clairvoyance of the Heart. I still remember our first dinner that weekend. He was in…
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THROUGH THE DEVELOPMENT OF SPACE & TIME
It is only through space and time that our most influential experiences can shape shift.
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SUNDAY FUNDAY: BACK TO THE BASES & THE ART OF THE KISS
We were all young once. The frenetic desire to demonstrate our sexual skills. Now, its time to do the opposite and let our lips just linger…
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CHAPTER 2: BACK TO THE BEGINNING
I would be remiss if I didn’t share how I became it. Let me take you back to where it all began. 2012, an Anniversary party where I knew the company’s founders. I was wearing my black velvet Hollywould heels with the Swarovski crystals and the back seam stockings. Those stockings were his kryptonite, little did I know. He as much said so when he introduced himself. While I appreciated the Alpha in his approach and demeanor, I had no idea that this chance meeting would change the course of my life for the next five years.
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AN ESCORT’S MEMOIR: ANTICIPATING YOU
It starts with a phone call. This distinctive nervous energy burns through this invisible line between us. The anticipation of our meeting. Cinema noir. The voice leaves an air of mystery… I imagine you. What are you doing at that very moment? What are you like when you are doing something you love? How are your mannerisms different in public versus private? It is a waiting game for us both, full of assumptions. Our gut and brain are intimately connected. Let us focus on that primal feeling that begins in your belly and travels through your limbic system wreaking havoc until the hour strikes. It’s time. In the seconds before,…
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A PETITE FRIDAY FANTASY: ROLEPLAY
Listen in to learn just how much I love a good role play.
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THE SECRET LIFE OF O- A PYSCHOSEXUAL ADVENTURE
I used pronouns with flexibility before it was “mandatory” on a LinkedIn profile. The embodiment not of an individual but of a thing, for the use and pleasure of someone else. The “it” represents that perfectly. You will notice, that I only refer to myself in the third person; “the slut” or “it.” What is written in these chapters, was the beginning of a journey that was unlike any other. Forget the cliche of “50 Shades of Grey.” This archive is an autobiographical sexual journey that delves deep into the psychosexual realms – BDSM and power exchange. It’s more than a story, it was my life for 5 years. If…
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LATE-NIGHT LOVE: BETWEEN THE SHOULDER BLADES
The place where your fingers run, lightly scratching the place that drives me just a little crazy. The place where I melt, just a little. I try not to distract myself because as your hands glide over my sweet spot, my head is buried between your thighs. My body is relaxed, preparing itself for what is next and then what happens after that. There is no rush. The journey we are on is a longer and curvier road. It’s amazing when you find that ordinary, non-sexual spot that can change your body and mind in an instant. You don’t try too hard. We are in flow with one another. There…